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be my escape- relient k
I’ve given up on giving up slowly, I’m blending in so
You won’t even know me apart from this whole world that shares my fate
This one last bullet you mention is my one last shot at redemption
because I know to live you must give your life away
And I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and
I’ve been locked inside that house all the while You hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me
And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise I’m going because
I gotta get outta here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake
I gotta get outta here
And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging You to be my escape.
I’m giving up on doing this alone now
Cause I’ve failed and I’m ready to be shown how
He’s told me the way and I’m trying to get there
And this life sentence that I’m serving
I admit that I’m every bit deserving
But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair
Cause I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and
I’ve been locked inside that house all the while You hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me
And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise I’m going because
I gotta get outta here
Cause I’m afraid that this complacency is something I can’t shake
I gotta get outta here
And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging You to be my escape.
I am a hostage to my own humanity
Self detained and forced to live in this mess I’ve made
And all I’m asking is for You to do what You can with me
But I can’t ask You to give what You already gave
Cause I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and
I’ve been locked inside that house all the while you hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me
And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise I’m going because
I’ve gotta get outta here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake
I’ve gotta get outta here
And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging
You to be my escape.
I fought You for so long
I should have let You in
Oh how we regret those things we do
And all I was trying to do was save my own skin
But so were You
So were You
Saturday, March 26, 2005
Title:
Comments:
Knowing your choices doesn't make this any easier.
Having made a decision, I shall pray for the strength to stick by it. It would be so easy to follow my heart instead of my head and the fact that I'm looking out for my future doesn't make the decision any less painful, only more selfish. I know this seems like a tall tale, but truly, it is not. In a mere 3 months, I feel as though I've lived a whole lifetime with them. I feel as though I've known them for years, their gestures, their expressions, their characteristics.
05s05.
We started out slow, but we quickly became fast friends. Not those types of I-don't-have-a-friend-so-I'll-take-you-as-a-subsitute-for-now friends. But good friends, the type of friends you'll want around you when shit happens. I always thought we were pretty close, but I'm perpetually suprised by the depth of love each and every single one of us has for each other. To us, 05s05 is just a couple of letters and an alphabet, stick us in some absurd class like 05s250 and we'll still shine.
But life moves on, and people come and go. There will never be another 05s05. I would say I'm sorry, but I know that it's not what you guys wanna hear. So for what it's worth, here's what I got to say...
05s05, listen up.
We're one hellavu of a class and I hope all of you know that. Never let anyone else tell you otherwise. It's going to be tough going the next two years as we slog to prepare for the A levels, people are going to argue, throw tatrums, become unreasonable etc. but understand that different people deal with things differently alright. I'm sorry, for a million and one things, for not being able to spend as much time with you guys as I wish I could have, for not going to be able to spend as much time with you guys as I have been spending, and of course, for making this decision. I'm sorry. But I promise I won't let you guys down, I will study hard and make you guys proud. :)
Make the next 05s05 as beautiful as this one is alright. I know I'll try my best to maintain these friendships and I know you guys will too, so we'll all try and see how things go. But this is not the end of the world for us, we'll bounce back and our friendships will grow even stronger. I love you guys, your constant naggings, your blind faith in me, your support and comforting words...
I love 05s05.
For what it's worth, there will always be a little piece of my heart there.
We're all praying for a miracle.